Big Baby's Addiction

You know how people always tell you that your kids "won't be doing that" when they go to kindergarten?  Well, I don't think any of those people know my little boy, Will, or his addiction to a thing called "Soosey"!!!  He just very well may be the one kid who does go to kindergarten sucking a soother (as if I would actually let him in the building doing that though, he would have to spit it out before he got on the bus! LOL).  I say this in a joking way, but there are times that I really wonder if it might happen.  He is totally, completely, utterly, with out question, addicted to that thing!  I have tried to take it away, tried to keep it from him until bedtime, tried to tell him he is too big for it, I have tried it all….and it doesn’t work.  I know what some of you are thinking – put hot sauce on it; cut the end off of it; throw them all away; just take it away and say he is done – and those are all very good suggestions, however I have tried almost all of them and here is what happens:

Hot sauce – this kid likes ALL food…I am sure he would probably just enjoy the hot sauce!!

Cut ends off – he was so mad at me that he threw a massive fit and scrounged around the house until he found a lost soother with the end attached!

Throw them all away – they are like weeds, they just keep popping up everywhere!

Just take it away and say no more – good luck to me!!

I have tried to tell him he can’t go to playschool in the Fall unless he gets rid of his soosey, but he just says he doesn’t want to go to playschool anyway!  I have tried to get him to give them up to a brand new baby, but he really doesn’t like babies!!  I have tried to tell him he is too big for it and he reminds me that he is my “baby”!! 

He would suck on his soosey 24 hours a day if I let him (no joke), but instead we try to limit it to just naps and bedtime.  Our efforts don’t seem to be working too well though, because most days he can be seen with it in his mouth at all times.  I try to get him to spit it out if someone comes to the door and he knows he is not allowed to take it to town, even if he sucks on it all the way there…it has to stay in the truck. 

I am saying all of this very tongue-in-cheek, but I do know that I must get this habit to stop at some point.  I have never had to deal with a soother sucker like this before (none of my other kids really ever cared much for soothers), and to be quite honest, I just thought he would stop one day, just like he stopped wearing diapers one day.  I think one of the biggest reasons he still has it is because I do not have enough fight in me to make it happen right now.  I figure I still have two full years until kindergarten starts…so we have a bit of time to make it happen yet!!

SJ

Will with two of his beloved Sooseys

Flour Power!

Greg sent me these pictures today, pictures I haven't seen in a while, but a night I will never forget!!

Before you see these pictures I would like to just say that my children were building forts in the living room and that is why you will see so much crap stuff lying about the living room floor!

Now, to continue with the story...

One November evening I went downstairs to either check email or put some laundry in, or maybe both (I really don't remember now), but I swear to you that I was only gone for 5 minutes - tops!!  Mark was just two weeks shy of his third birthday and Grace was 17 months old. 

When I walked upstairs and saw what was waiting for me I had only two choices...to laugh or cry.  I chose laughter and ran to get my camera!  I am so glad that I made the choice to laugh that night because even though it took me months to clean this up (no joke), it was a night that made everyone in our lives smile just a little bit more!

Enjoy!

SJ

We're just born with it...

I just read the comment my Great Aunt Hildred posted and it was about happiness (and Vitiligo) and she said that she thinks I have a happy soul, and she is right!  I have learned recently that happiness is 50% genetic, 10% from material items and 40% from things such as volunteering and helping others.  I must have some pretty good genes because I can say without question that I was born a happy person! 

I think my happiness shines through in one big way...my smile!  I believe that smiling is the greatest thing you can do when you first see someone...even if they are a stranger.  Have you ever smiled at someone and seen what happens?  They smile back (unless they are the poor souls who were not born happy...and believe me, I know some of those people).  We all love to see a baby smile, it automatically makes you happy, and I don't think it's any different when we see an adult smile at us...you just can't help but smile back.

The idea that only 10% of our happiness comes from material things makes perfect sense too.  I think that most people believe it makes up a much bigger percentage than that, thinking that if we only had that bigger house, that better vehicle, that nicer wardrobe, we would be that much happier.  I have learned over time that happiness has very little to what we have and more to do with what we do and what we believe.  I have lived under the poverty line as a young single mother and I have also lived a very comfortable life as a married woman with a one and two income household.  I have a beautiful house (that is too big at times), a nice vehicle (that is aslo too big at times) and more clothing in this house than any mother ever wants to wash!!  My kids have toys coming out of their ears, movies, video games, bikes, and books.  We have more than I ever dreamed I could have and I am now starting to get rid of it.  Of course I will not get rid of my house, but so much of what's in it is starting to find new homes.  There are certain things I will never get rid of, such as the quilt my mom made me years ago or the cross-stitched wedding gift my Grandma Duguid made for us or the handprint Natalie gave me for Mother's Day when she was 5 years old; those things I will treasure forever.  The things that are leaving my house, destined for other homes are things such as platters, divided trays, books that have been read - or those that have never been read, clothing that is too small, too big or too ugly, lamps, toys, etc. I took two truck loads to the Playschool here in town, because they held a Fundraiser Garage Sale yesterday.  I told myself to just stay away from the garage sale, but I just couldn't, so I went to see what was there.  There was A LOT of stuff piled into that gym, but I only came home with a tricycle (which I have been looking for since both Greg and I ran ours over on two seperate ocassions!), a box of barbies for the day home kids (because there is no way on God's green earth that Grace is giving up her barbies for the day home...I am still working on the generosity thing with her!), and some books which just happened to belong to a good friend of mine (and I am sure I could have read them for free before this garage sale, but I paid for them...because it's a fundraiser!).  I bid on a few items at the silent auction too - Boston Pizza, Pizza Hut and an oil change, all things that would be used up and not have to sit around my house; I am not sure yet if I won any of them though...but I don't think so! 

The third part of happiness is said to be the volunteer work we do and helping others...a whopping 40% of our happiness comes from that!  I now understand why I keep volunteering for stuff...it just makes me happy!  I have always volunteered for things...except washing dishes or cleaning houses!!  I was an "In- School Mentor" with Big Brothers & Big Sisters when I first moved to Lloydminster, after that I joined the board for Big Brothers & Big Sisters and sat on it for 7 years; I was the president of Vermilion Play Development for two years, classroom convener for one year and when I return to playschool in the fall with Will, I will be vice-president for most likely the two years that he is there;  I have just joined the indoor playground's board, as "toy master" (which really does sound like a fun job!);  I have volunteered in nursing homes and hospitals;  I was manager of Mark's soccer team for one season (the one and only time I was able to drag him to the field) and I am currently the Beaver's leader here in Vermilion.  I have always stepped up to do my fundraising and volunteering hours for all activites as well (and by golly, there is a lot of fundraising that goes along with kids activities!).  I have never been shy about volunteering my time and I hope to get my kids to start volunteering in some way this summer, as I think it is one of the most important things we can teach our children.  I have often thought that perhaps I just wanted to "belong" to something and that is why I was always volunteering and joining things, but now I have realized that I do it simply because it makes me happy!

So, don't forget to be happy and smile...it really is contagious!!

SJ

Ramblings...

Have you ever had times in your day when thoughts just seem to pop into your head and somehow you end up talking to yourself about these thoughts...often out loud?  I have these moments quite often, but sometimes the thoughts are started by someones comments or conversations.

Here are some of my rambling thoughts:

• Last night at Beaver's (I am the leader), we were playing "Freeze Dance" outside and the only type of music that we had was my iPhone, so I turned it on and the boys started to dance and freeze, dance and freeze.  One of the boys said to me: "is that an iPhone 4?" and I said "no, it's a 3" and one of the other boys said "you can tell cause the 4 is fatter"...really, at 6 years old you know that??  They then proceeded to tell me that one of the boys in their class has an iPhone 4 and one other boy said that a boy in his class had a Blackberry!!  Now, here is where my thoughts start going a little nuts!  Are the people of this world insane?  Who in their right mind thinks a kid needs an iPhone or Blackberry?  In fact who in the world thinks a kid really needs a cell phone at all?  My daughter was not allowed to have a phone until she was 16 years old and had a job so she could pay for it herself but I am always blown away to hear about parents who think their kids "need" cell phones or fancy iPods.  My friend Bobbie-Jo made a good point one day when she said this: "I know a lady who said that she got her 8 year old a cell phone so she would always know where her kid is" and in response to that she said: "shouldn't you always know where you 8 year old is anyway?"...good point!  I think there is some twisted mindset we have now where we think our children need to have everything that is out there now!  I am tempted to just get my kids walkmans and some cassette tapes so they can listen to music...it worked for us!  My kids (with the exception of Natalie) have never even asked about the idea of having iPods, iPhones, iPads, etc. and I don't plan on planting that seed anytime soon. 

• Vitiligo ( /ˌvɪtɪˈlaɪɡoʊ/), is a disorder that causes depigmentation of patches of skin. It occurs when melanocytes, the cells responsible for skin pigmentation, die or are unable to function. The cause of vitiligo is unknown, but research suggests that it may arise from autoimmune, genetic, oxidative stress, neural, or viral causes.^[1] The incidence worldwide is less than 1%.^[2] The most common form is non-segmental vitiligo.

This topic has been popping into my head lately every time I look into the mirror.  I have had vitiligo for about 14 years now and I have watched my Mom deal with it for my whole life, so I am no stranger to it.  It has never bothered me before, even though my skin looks like "marble cheese", according to my three year old, but now it is starting to go on my face!  I seem to remember my mom saying that it bothered her the most when it started happening on her face (though she can correct me if that is not ture) and I can understand why now.  I have had some spots around my eyes for a while, however my glasses hide the spots so I don't often notice them.  What is bothering me now is that just in the last week most of the area around my mouth is now white!  Because I have vitiligo, I try to stay out of the sun, so my natural complexion is not as dark as it used to be, and that is helpful when trying not to look too much like a freak!  My hands are completely white now, however all other areas of my body are still "marbled" and it really doesn't bother me, execpt for my face.  Eventually I will be completely white, incuding my hair - which is already starting to turn white in some areas - and I will try my best to embrace my new complexion and hair colour.  For the time being though, I have to admit that I am having a bit of a hard time facing the fact that my face will now be freakish too!!

• As you may or may not know, I run a Licensed Family Day Home, which means that I work for an agency and have rules and regulations to follow.  We are going through a process called reaccreditation and we have to have site visits in our homes so the government (who helps to fund us) can make sure we are following all the rules and doing everything just right.  In preparing for this site visit we have gone through the checklist of what they will be watching for and one of those things includes discipline...which you may think means teaching a child right from wrong or even punishing a child for something they did...you would be wrong though, and I would fail my site visit!  According to accreditation, we are not to give a child time out (or anything harsher), we are not to say "no" or "don't" and we are to only use positive statements around the children.  For example, if a child bit another child, this would have to be my response: "Oh Johnny, teeth are for eating, you must be nice to your friend"..."let's go play with some toys now."  Is it any wonder why our children are so out of control and self centered these days?  The people looking after our children (a huge population of children are in licensed care) are not allowed to discipline them in anyway what so ever!  I am not saying that we should go back to having straps in schools, but I think a little fear is good for a kid.  I am not sure if this way of thinking will change anytime soon, but I fear that if it doesn't change, neither will the children!

Those are just some of my rambling thoughts for today and I am getting tired, so I will turn my mind off for another day and hit the hay!

SJ

Life Lesson Learned!

I learned a very big lesson in life today!  After dragging up to six kids to dance class every Monday, from September through April, so Grace could take her lessons, she decided at literally the last minute, that she was not going to go on stage at the recital today!  The lesson I learned is to never put my kids in something that I think they would benifit from, but instead let them tell me exactly what it is they want to do.

Today was not the best day for this to happen either (not that there would really be a good day for it), as I am surviving on about 4.5 hours of sleep as we didn't get home until past 2:00 a.m. from our trip.  Grace did not seem to be in any kind of mood to do anything that involved other human beings today, but we had to get to the recital on time, so I fed her, packed her up and grabbed her costume.  I realized when I arrived that all the other little girls in her group had curly hair and Grace still had straight, so I found a teenage girl I know and asked if she could lend me her curling iron...instead, she curled it for me!  Once she was in her costume (and let me tell you, she looked so stinkin' cute - not that you will ever know because she would NOT allow me to take any pictures of her), we went out to find our seats so that she could watch the other dancers until it was her turn.  My Dad and brother came, Natalie showed up and the dancers began.  Grace's class was first after the intermission, and she kept asking me when she got to go on the stage and I kept her updated.  She was so excited about going on...until she scraped her arm on the way down the stairs and that was the beginning of the end!  At this point, I am already annoyed at almost everything because I was so tired and I was just counting my blessings because of the fact that Grace seemed so willing and excited to dance today, but once that scrape happened, I knew it was giong to go down hill from there.  I kissed it better and told her it would be okay.  We followed the rest of her class down the stairs and met up with her teacher backstage.  Once they started lining the girls up, Grace just grabbed onto my hand and said she wasn't going on!  Miss Ellen, the teachers helper, said that she didn't have to go on if she didn't want to, and this was my response: "Don't even give her that option!"...but there was no way she was going on!  Miss Sam (teacher) and I carried her across the stage - in front of the entire audience - just to get her to the correct spot and I told her I would sit right in the front row so she could see me.  She was stuck like glue to me and Miss Sam finally pulled her off of me and I told her I would be waiting right there for her when she was done.  The announcer said that the Preschool Creative class was coming on next and as they all filed out I held my breath.  She never appeared...at all.  I would have been happier if she at least came out and just sat on the stage glaring at the audience, at least then she would have made all the time and effort we put into the year a little bit worth it.  I am not sure what emotion I should have been feeling, but I was really just mad at her then.  I walked with all the other moms to pick up our kids backstage and they all gave me that look of: I-know-just-how-you-feel-and-it-is-okay-that-she-didn't-go-on-stage-so-don't-feel-bad.  Guess what, it's not okay!  If I was the only person who had bothered to go and watch her, then it wouldn't have been so bad, but I can imagine my Dad has better things to do on a Sunday afternoon than sit for two hours to watch girls dance when the only one he came to watch doesn't even go on!!!  I told her I was very sad about the fact that she didn't dance (I tried my best not to get mad at her), but I know she could tell how I was feeling.  It doesn't help though when she just gives me that look of hers when she doesn't like something (you know the look if you know Grace!), so I decided that I would make her realize that it is not okay to just decide not to do something like a recital at the end of the year and I told her that I was planning on taking her for ice-cream after she danced, but that would no longer happen.  I know that might sound a little cruel, but I really was ticked off at that point!!  She bawled her eyes out all the way to the truck and once we made it home and she came in the house, she took her costume off in the mudroom, headed for her bedroom got her pj's on and grabbed her blanket.  I told her I was more sad than mad, but I also told her that her dancing career is officially over!!

I remember about 13 years ago I went through a very similar situation with Natalie her first year of dance (she only danced for two years).  She did end up going on stage, but I had the exact same feeling of being on the verge of tears because nobody else's kid is acting that way!  And it really doesn't matter how many women try to tell you that "she will go on next time", because guess what ladies...there will not be a next time! 

Lesson learned!

SJ

San Francisco...DAY SIX....last day!

Well, our trip has come to an end and I have had a great time!  Yes, I have been cold, hot, tired, sore, hungry, full, but through all that this has been one of the best trips I have had!  We want to bring our kids here next time we come though…there are so many things we want to show them! 

This morning we got up and packed our bags but we had until 12:00 to check out and 4:15 to leave for the airport, so we decided to leave our bags in the room and go out for the day to do the few things that were left on our list to do.  As usual I put on my scarf and jacket and we headed out of the hotel, got about ½ a block and I had to turn back to change my clothes!  Out of all the days that we have been here, this is the first one that is actually warm, make that hot!  Thank goodness for the breeze, but it is only a breeze, not the insane wind that it has been!  Maybe Mother Nature knows it’s the weekend and has decided to treat the people with amazing weather!  This is the first day that you haven’t been able to surf on the ocean, but instead sailboats were all over the water.  Today was the first time I went out with no sweater or jacket.  Today is the first time I said that I was hot!  I am happy that we were here throughout the week though, because for the first time during our trip I would say there are way too many people here now!

After I changed my clothing, we walked to Lombard Street – the Crookedest Street in the world!  It is very neat to see and I would suggest you Google it if you don’t know what it is.  We could have taken a trolley up to the top of it, but we decided that we could just walk to the top…STUPID!  I am amazed they haven’t used this as part of the Amazing Race yet…it would be a good one!  Imagine hiking up three city blocks…straight up!  It is so steep that they would make a killing if they had a chair lift or a tow rope!  Once we got to the top of the second block there it was, the Crookedest street and after sat down to have a rest and let my heart rate get back to a normal rate, we continued to the top of the crooked street.  This time there were steps, which for some reason I thought would be better than walking straight up a sidewalk, but these steps are bizarre and tiny….like a half step.  I felt drunk going up them and had to hold on the railing because I was beginning to get a little woozy going up.  Once I reached the top I looked down toward my purse, which at one time had my sweater hanging off of it…no more though!  If I didn’t really like that sweater I would have just left it wherever it fell off, but I do like it!  I hiked down the tiny stairs until I saw that someone had picked it up and hung it over the railing for me.  I retrieved my sweater and made my way back to the top.  Some kid should really open up a lemonade stand at the top of that street – it would probably pay for his college!!

Going down the streets is obviously much easier than going up, but I wouldn’t want to be wearing high heels going down!  Both Greg and I have had some pretty bad shin splints from the trips down the streets.  It is worth making the trips up and down the streets though, just to take in all the amazing houses and architecture in this city!  Just a side note, I have not seen one single overweight local here in San Francisco!  I can’t imagine you could be overweight when you have to walk up and down those streets every day, and I imagine most people would have to walk them as parking will run you about $60,000/year here!

After our hike today, we went for lunch and then went to Ghirardelli to buy some chocolate for souvenirs.  We came back to the hotel, packed our bags and put them into storage for a few hours.  We had about three hours to do anything left to do.  We realized at that point that we didn’t have too much left to do!  We checked out an old arcade museum where we played some games and watched on game called “English Execution” – how gruesome – and Greg played a game he used to play in the Peace River Bowling Alley.  We strolled along the piers and sat down to do a little people watching.  We wrapped up our time in San Francisco with a special treat that we have been saving for this last day – a Ghirardelli Ice Cream Sundae…MMMMMMMM!

We are sitting in the lobby of our hotel as I type this post, waiting for our shuttle to pick us up and take us to the airport for our trip home.  I am looking very forward to getting home, to seeing my kids and being in my own house, my own town. 

Tony Bennett may have left his heart in San Francisco, but I left my heart at home!

SJ